If you all know anything about me by now, it’s that I’m a dreamer.
A few years ago I went to a Women’s Conference kind of thing. I left on what I like to call, “A Retreat High.”
Being around so many different women, all with their own stories, in one place, for several days, was amazing to me.
I grew up in a very small town in Utah. I’ve lived here my whole life. Everyone the same for the most part. Same goals, same ideas about things. After meeting all of the women I have over the years, I have come to realize how small my world has been. Small.
Sitting at a table with women from all around the country brought something to life for me.
A few months later I held my first retreat.
It was in a dumpy little building but a friend and I made it magical. The women there were mostly from Utah but there were a few from out of state (what a thrill that was when they signed up!) and it was just a beautiful few days. We crafted, laughed, cried, ate, and at the end of it all I was exhausted and exhilarated all at the same time. I was hooked.
I held two more that year with guest artists and have held a few more since then.
It’s hard work. I’m not afraid of that. What I’m afraid of is what is rolling around inside my noggin.
Here is what is inside my head on any given day…I’m not good enough. Why would people come here vs there? There is so much cooler, they have so much more to offer. No one is going to come. If no-one signs up then it’s because I’m lame and I should just not try. It’s so hard to find out your lame. Ugh. I should just give up this whole thing. Blah blah blah. You get the point.
But guess what? I am PASSIONATE about gathering women together. I know the strength that comes from a group of women creating memories, art, and taking time for themselves. It is powerful. Retreating from their lives to sit together for a few days does something. I truly feel like it is important for women to have times like these. I feel like it brings something to their lives that is significant…a connection to themselves and other women. Connection is so crucial to a healthy life.
So I keep working and fighting for what my passion is. I may never accomplish what I’ve set out to do but, in the meantime, I have and will bring something to my life, my daughter’s lives, and other women’s lives. It may not ever be as big and grand as I dreamt of. But I will know that I fought for it; this thing that I love to do. I find satisfaction in that.
Have a beautiful week my friends.
Enjoy it and do something that makes your wild heart come to life!